December 2011
9 posts
Txt Chat: There and Back Again
Her: We should def hang out some time.
I: Yes. Indeed.
Her: Thoughts?
I: Yep.
Her: Huh?
I: I have thoughts all the time. And you?
Her: Uh. Sure?
I: I bet you a buck that you are thinking thoughts right now.
Her: (Confused face emoticon) I meant when would you like to hang out and what would you like to do. Let's make a plan.
I: I got one!
Her: (smiley emoticon) yeah? What's the plan?
I: We travel light. Let's hunt some orc.
Her: What? What does that mean?
I: We're not gonna take a lot of stuff with us when we go orc hunting.
Her: No.
I: Just think about it.
Her: I did.
I: You owe me a dollar.
A very special holiday message to you,
Before I embark on my Christmas eve tradition of spending the day alone in my tuxedo, eating an entire box of cheez-it crackers, while watching Amistad without the sound on and screaming ‘Amistad!!’ every time Anthony Hopkins hits someone with his cane, I wanted to wish all of you creative, unique, courageous, artistic individuals a very merry christmas eve!
RE: My fake Christmas List that my family didn't...
4. I want an iPad. I know it’s a lot more expensive than our 100 dollar limit. But I want one anyway. And think about it: I’m likely to get rich and famous pretty soon. You get me an iPad, you will be in my good graces. I’ll take you to Hollywood premieres and in front of all the paparazzi, adoring fans, and lights and crap, I’ll scream and point to you and be all “you know what this crazy bastard...
“I love talking about nothing. It is the only thing I know anything about.”
– Oscar Wilde
My fake Christmas List that my family didn't think...
1. I want a live kangaroo (if you can get one for under $100). Don’t hem and haw thinking this is a tricky thing to get. Just go to a zoo, look for one that’s old, or hopping awkwardly, or that looks kind of dead. I’m sure someone will give you a deal. Sick animals are depressing. Zookeepers probably want to be rid of it. I want a kangaroo. I want to teach it to spit at slow...
“It’s kinda fun to do the impossible.”
– Walt Disney
WatchTrident spot I shot during the anthrax scare of 2001.
I sing, I dance. I, in no uncertain circumstances, ham it up.
